Let’s Analyze Kim Kardashian’s Wedding Hair and Makeup

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You know what's cringey? When people refer to Kim Kardashian's nuptials as “America's royal wedding.” Um, no. Maybe the guest list and price tags were similar, but to me it was more of an over-the-top Trista and Ryan sort of affair. Times one thousand. Plus, call me cynical, but it's just a little too convenient—konvenient—that Kim married a Kris. With a K. I'm anticipating the Kim & Kris TV spin-off already.

Anyway! Snark aside, who doesn't love gawking at a celebrity wedding, I ask you? It's been a great summer for that, starting with Will and Kate, of course, and then Kate Moss and Jamie Hince. Now we have Kim and her new hubby, Kris Humphries (who should really just change his name to Kardashian at this point and call it a day). They got hitched on Saturday… and I am reluctantly going to come out and say that I really love Kim's look. So sue me. Do you? Let's discuss.

So first things first. I love the diamond headpiece. LOVE. IT.

When people kept making the whole “princess” comparison I was afraid we'd see Kim walk down the aisle in an actual tiara, which would've made her look like a poor man's Kate Middleton (or something out of that Gypsy Wedding show). But this is more “Armenian princess”—it's exotic and glamorous and also exciting for those of us with a penchant for Nicole Richie-style headbands that sit across the forehead instead of on top of the head. No word yet on where it's from, although the lace veil (and the dress) are Vera Wang, of course.

I love that she paired it with a simple, slicked-back low bun. If only my hair would produce one of that magnitude. For those of us without extensions, I hear there is a donut thing that allows it to be done. I need to research this, because in my attempt to copy Lucy Liu's hair (as well as lipstick) for the wedding I attended last week, even copious amounts of Redken's gel slush texturizer and a whole handful of spin pins couldn't help my Size S side bun. Sigh.

Now let's move on to makeup. As I reported last week, Kim's makeup artist, Mario Dedivanovic, was asking people for ideas on her look—”radiant/natural or sexy/glam”—but remained tight-lipped right up until the wedding. Now, I don't know if it's just me, but… isn't this kind of radiant, natural, sexy and glam all at once?

I kind of think so. To me, she looks a lot less plastic and mask-like than usual, although it's possible that's just because this is the only up-close photo I can find and it's not great quality. I'm sure there's as much makeup on that mug as ever.

Anyway, it wouldn't be a Kim Kardashian public appearance without the signature Kardashian touches: a zillion false lashes, smoked-out eyes, tanned skin and contouring. I could have done with a less dramatic eye here, but I like that she at least kept the colour to the upper lid, instead of underneath the eye, for a cleaner look.

The other thing of note is that Kim traded her usual nude lip for a pink gloss. AND she's wearing loads of my favourite makeup category: blush. Hooray! I think the pink touches are what brings this look into bridal territory. I've gotta say, I do approve.

If only the dress wasn't quite so boobalicious. (Although I wouldn't expect anything less. Er, more…)

As for the rest of the fam, well, everybody got to look like a bride for the day! Seriously, the dress code was black and white—and mom Kris and daughters Kendall and Kylie Jenner also wore tight, long, strapless white dresses. Hmmm…

Here's a full-body pic of Kourtney:

Even the guests got in on the dress-like-a-bride action!

Oh, LiLo. Put those boobs away, girl!

Tell me:

Was Kim a gorgeous bride or too Gypsy-bride?

How do you feel about her hair and makeup?

Do you like the black and white theme or is having all the guests in white dresses a bit too… krazy?